I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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