got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Congratulations! We have a period
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize