We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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