Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
