somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
We have so much sex to catch up on
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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