There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
