ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
