Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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