Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
