found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Your cock deserves a montage
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
