Duck Duck Cougar?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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