ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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