it was like his penis was on wheels.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
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