you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
