My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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