And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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