They should really pass out barf bags in church
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
