Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
