it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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