Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
