Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
