Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize