Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
