We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize