We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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