Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
