I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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