he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
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