What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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