what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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