I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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