I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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