Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
