some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
