Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
