I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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