Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
