before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
