We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
