They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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