I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
