I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
