She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
