So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
