Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
