Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
