how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
