no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
