You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
