Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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