so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Walk of Shame today included voting.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
