He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
